put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
he chased her out of the bar yelling "TAKE MY VIRGINITY" and i havent seen her since
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
I don't have any bail money, if that's where this conversation is going
I should start prefacing bondage with girls saying "I know you've read 50 Shades, but there is a 33% you're gonna freakout and go home, while I jerk it alone"
Nope we are at the ER my brothers crazyass neighbor kinda stabbed him in the neck. He's gonna be fine.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
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