the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
throwing up turkey will be a nice break from throwing up ramen
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This is the weirdest negotiation ever.
This is what happens when two people with zero shame try to argue.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Enjoy the penises
Also I just had a pointless meeting and the only thing I accomplished were my kegals
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Randomize