So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I heard you threw up in your lap?
I heard that too.
reason #14 for loving my boobs...just got out of a 40mph over the limit speeding ticket thru a work zone. i dont think the cop knew i even had a face
we are both sitting on my bed desperately refreshing the order tracking page for dominos.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
