WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
Aren't you glad we're at the point in our relationship where I don't even ask why you're hiding in the cabinet?
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
Apparently you get kicked out of gay bars if they catch you putting the entire free condom bowl in your purse.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Randomize
