I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
I think I just need to get a pillow shaped like a toilet seat.
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
When boys buy condoms it makes me feel proud of their mothers for doing a good job
Someone fucked up, the stop Kony day is on 4/20,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh you know, sitting here in my bathing suit watching antiques road show and petting the cat. Just the usual
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
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