omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
No need to clean the puke on the driveway. The squirrel is eating it up.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I gave the bike taxi guy a blowjob because I didn't have any cash. College.
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
No, I found out he was gay when I walked in on him blowing the guy from the dorm room next to ours.
Randomize