I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
ATTN: We are officially 15 weeks from our annual "Get-Mega-Stoned-and-BBQ" event. Start saving up the proper supplies. That is all.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
Why do you have an empty bottle of port in your bathroom bin?
This medicine is making me nuts. I just woke up and I thought I was in a glass case with Asians staring at me.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
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