Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Clothing is a burden necessitated by propriety.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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