He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
What would you say if I got first degree burns on my nipples from drinking coffee topless?
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Randomize
