you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
hi sober isdnt real. this is a mass rtoomate taext i thing. bye
AMAZING.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
What is soo wrong about a house of half-naked people hugging each other and laughing?
The pinata full of drugs?
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Also I'm at the pub and there are old lady pirates gyrating on a pole. I wish you were here.
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
I'm like 89% sure I could get him to buy me a car in exchange for a half-assed handy.
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Am I the only one who finds it completely appropriate to pre-game our Brazilians?
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
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