So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
the trash is collected at 5:50 on mondays. i was up puking all night and heard them
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
He's only a freshman and he needs to expirence shit like that..
YOU would be the Freshman Expirence
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I got inside last night via doggy door
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
she stuffed her marc jacobs purse full of cereal
classy
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
Randomize
