I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
everytime someone would look at you, you started to try and deep throat your beer bottle.
FYI the landlord called, said we need to clean the puke off the side of the house...was someone on the roof lastnight??
Whoevers house this is has only beer and cream cheese in the fridge. Thats the diet im gonna go on
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
I think we need to stage a munchie intervention for Ben. I just watched him use a tortilla as a potholder to dump water out of his ramen.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
Randomize
