my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Two girls down stairs, two girls up stairs and....
We've got ourselves a situation
So I'm on the can right now reading a court transcript for an appeal. Some dude is paying $155 an hour for me to take a shit.
I really need to stop coming home drunk and lint rolling my rabbit.
Your like the Mozart of blow jobs, you make every other girl seem like cheesy elevator music.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
I opened a bud lite with a fencing sword last night. Yeah you banged that guy.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
Randomize
