you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
i just broke my key off in the door of my house because the engine wasnt starting
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
he's a firefighter. like being a firefighter screams MY DICK IS HUGE SO I'M NOT AFRAID TO DIE IN THIS FIRE.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
I'm smoking in a kimono on the couch. Bring me gin.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Did I tell you I drunk fucked my one roommate last week
Uh no
Randomize
