i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
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WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
I just want to know how she convinced 6 sober ROTC guys to have an ab contest on a street corner at 2 in the morning.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
And he came by and picked me up. We cuddled in his car then had sex until... an officer doing his rounds put a spotlight on crazy haired, naked me straddling him.
Like he was inside me when I made eye contact with a police man.
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You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
Just sitting at dinner with my dad...simultaneously texting "daddy" to confirm saturday's spanking and telling another guy to get condoms before Im done with dinner. Don't know when I got so ate up but I'm loving it. You?
Regretting asking you what you were doing.
He was singing on top of spaghetti, and then started crying. He said it was the saddest song ever, "so so sad".
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
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