does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
After I told my husband the docter shot me in the ass, he said - oh they can but I can't?!
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Interesting. All i can really say is humanoid shaped doritos bags melting very slowly
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
