oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
We found an eightball on the ground last night. I mean, really, who does that?
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
Randomize
