i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Dude, she literally stopped, mid fuck said "I want soup" got off my dick and make top ramen.
I just dont understand why you didnt cut me off when I took the funnel into the bathroom and started peeing and funneling at the same time
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Briing, briiing- tricycle ridden. Where is my crown?
Just whatever you do please don't lick his face again.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
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