it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
He;s fine. He just kept saying "hurricane Gordon is coming to shore" and flexed his muscles a lot.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
He sent me a limp picture of his penis with the caption " same ol, same ol' I cant believe these are the type of guys I sleep with
You went over didnt you?
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Operation rebound complete... I fucked the bouncer
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
Randomize