And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
Solid. Can't put a price on good times
You can and it's called a liver.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
Why is there puke in my guitar?
Because you puked in your guitar.
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
THE STRIPPER HAD A GUN JOHN!
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
I just realized I had arrested my one night stand from last night...
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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