Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
Judging by the grocery store, everyone stocked up on frozen pizza and beer for the blizzard. If our generation ever faces doomsday, we'll go out smiling.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
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