suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
I just walked past a woman in the bar stroking a mans crotch, yelling 'I made this. I made this happen.'
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
We really gotta change brands again because 2-ply is making us feel like the celebrities we aren't.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
If she's over 40, she won't believe you if you say " I'm only going to put the head in"
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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