So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
It's hard to believe so much cum came out of such a small penis.
well now i know if i ever need to drive puke and talk on the phone at the same time i can
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
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Dude best one night stand i woke she was cleaning our fridge while waiting for the cab to show
He's getting off drug court. We're doing a super-blunt with 50 dollars worth stuffed inside. He almost cried tears of joy when we told him.
Sometimes I just want to serenade his penis with cheesy 80s songs.
Turns out I hooked up with a chick who has lupus. I don't know if that's a bucket list thing or not, but it's now on mine. Check.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
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He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
Where does drinking Flat, warm beer from two days ago rank of the No Fucks Given scale?
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
There's something sensual about taking off a pair of socks.
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