I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
Just spent five minutes taking pictures of my hands for some random guy.
Thanks for reminding me why I talk about you behind your back. Get laid.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
You dont understand. she was my french AND spanish teacher. that's 2 kinds of freaky. i have to find her on facebook.
just convinced someone I was a virgin. I love when people don't know me.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
You forget how awesome toilet paper is until you have to wipe your ass with a piece of notebook paper...
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
My soul is telling me that I need to take this exam naked.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
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