My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
Please sleep at your girlfriend's tonight
Why?
'Cause I wanna jack off tonight.. And you being in the room makes things awkward
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
I said we should get a taxi and you were waving down cars, three of which were cops and one of them slowed down and shook his head then kept driving
He didn't think we needed a taxi
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
I rocked my own world, he was just a prop.
Just at the gym drinking. We call it treadmillcolada
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
I thought my holiday spirit was gone this year until I got banged to Christmas music. It's back.
I wore the clothes I got arrested in last night to work today.....there is no where but up from here!
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
Got home. Somebody tried to sell me weed on the street. I've never had to try so little to find a dealer before.
Randomize
