what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
At the wedding. Seated next to the bar. No way this ends well
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
It's ok for me to have his baby but I can't be his friend on fb. Wth is wrong with this
Would it be bad if I bought her bread, meat, cheese, and stuff as her christmas present so she can make me a sandwich?
Our house almost burnt down last night. I woke up at 4:10am to the smoke alarm going off bc the bean bag chair was on fire so i extinguished it and smoked a bowl at 4:20 to celebrate my fire extinguishing abilities
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Time to eat Mexican food til I hate myself.
That's completely alright, I do it a lot.
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
My car has a permanent smell of sex to it now.
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
