I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
the only joy I get out of her anymore is hitting on her friends and ignoring her. it's chaos for them. like shaking a slutty ant farm
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I'm drunk but I just ate 2 heads of broccoli so does that mean it evens out?
Yes absolutlely
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
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