so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I knew she could be a good mother by the way she craddled three 40oz's.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
What was your penis's nickname in high school? Also, what was it's theme song?
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
remember that guy i blew in a bathroom in barcelona, i just blew him again in rome. lightning does strike twice.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Had a dream I was doing scat with Caroline. I need to lay off the cheese at night
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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