Yup u can hook up with me now and not goto jail
You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
dude, I'm listening to "I believe I can fly", i'm high, and driving. this is so amazing.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I told him I was going to sit on his face after I got out of the shower, he threw up the arm boners and yelled "STEVE HOLT!!" I might actually stop sleeping with other dudes.
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Also, there's definitely not a non-hilarious way to ask to stick something up your butt.
If you ever "miss" working, I'm going to fist you with my hulk hands. BOTH of them.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
Randomize
