dude, she has braces
i meant the dude w the ponytail.
i was less creeped out when i thought you were talking about the 14 y.o.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
I just used my med student white coat as ID to buy beer at 9 in the morning
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
How do I tell your little brother I lost my virginity wearing nothing but his socks?
Formal letter or email.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
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