So I don't have any furniture but we just skateboard drunk around the floor.
this beer tastes like vomit already
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I was found on the hood of someone elses car... Who would've thought there were 2 white nissans?
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
"Functional." Your standards for how you feel after drinking are so high.
When your night starts by chugging margarita and drinking vodka out of tupperware, I feel it's best to stay realistic.
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Sobered up midsex and just went with it. After he tried cuddling and I awkwardly rolled out of the bed to find someone on the floor, apparently it was his room so he got to listen.
the puppy had a little leather gag and was using a ball gag as a fetch toy
I'll just go on tinder. Seeking strong male to help take apart ikea furniture and move. I'll touch your dick.
You ate ashes out of my bong
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
I took it as a sign from the lord above that she wanted me to creep on these men.
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