Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
he said "I would have fucked you in the chipotle bathroom" and I can't get over how awesome that would've been
Im playing a game I have to take a drink every time my gram asks me the same question hammered by 4 guaranteed
Randomize
