Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Her friend drew me a diagram of how we could get away with her giving me a blowjob at work.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Moral of the story: If you're gonna throw a glass of wine in a guy's face, don't do it in your own kitchen.
Maybe it's just my body's way of telling me I don't need pinky toes. Like I'm the next evolutionary leap or something...
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
I appreciate your acceptance of my lack of morals
I'M GOING TO DIE ALONE WITHOUT ANYONE PRETENDING TO BE A MARRIED COUPLE WHILE DRUNK AT A MALL WITH ME
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
woke up, covered in gummy bears, with a note that said "the gummy army won"
Randomize