good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
He compliments me like a gay guy and fucks me like a starved nympho. I'm in love.
If you're not washing nut sweat off of your forehead this morning I'm disappointed in you
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
hey dude, just got with the girl in H4. so mark H off the apartment list
haha we are half through our lease and already checked off 17 letters
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
All I want for my birthday to be fingered and eat pizza
I took the beard trimmer to my balls this morning.\nMuch blood. Much blood from my scrotum.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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