There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
I think I am morally bankrupt
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
not my fault. i got her to believe he wrote an oasis song. he still managed to find a way to make sure no girl ever gets near his penis.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Before you ask, yes. Whatever you're wearing IS too slutty for his mom's funeral.
I gave him head while he watched NASCAR. My future flashed before my eyes.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Hey, 'thunder cock' as proud as I am for you getting laid, could you put a muzzle on her? I have to be up at 5, thanks.
Who wrote Most Moistest Dad on my chest and what the fuck does it mean?!?
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
Their children would look like the Michelin man and smell like chef Boyardee
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
Don't date the locals. They're all tainted.
Randomize
