She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Well for starters i'm drinking vodka out of a bell pepper.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
taking a shot every time they compare curling to a real sport
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
I want to figure out a way to work "if you suddenly die, I might turn into an extreme hoarders" into my valentines day poem
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I need you to ship me a penis cookie care package.
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
well i can officially check "have sex in a prius" off my bucket list...
I don't think you could pull off being mean.
How do you think I'm still single?
Randomize
