Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
thank you for tagging me in all my pictures as "skank" and yourself as "made by the hands of God"
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
