there was 4 little kids screaming in high pitched voices at the top of their lungs at the sox game and their mom just leaned over to me and said 'if thats not birth control i dont know what is'
member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
cutting back on calories before spring break by only taking shots instead of drinking actual drinks.
the diet of an alcoholic...
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
I tried to put my heels in the coat check
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
Anything special planned for Valentines Day?
Does testing the strength of my coworker’s marriage count?
Randomize
