just went onto Yahoo and the featured article had a picture of one of the Jonas brothers. last two times the featured article was a celebrity's face the headline was "Michael Jackson is Dead" and "Pitchman Billy Mays is Dead" so naturally I got a little excited. Turns out he's just engaged. Who gives a fuck.
maybe after you take off her top her face will be hotter
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Having him eat chocolate out of you is not as romantic as it sounds. I'm still finding pieces.
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
My right arm is handcuffed to my leg... Please help.
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
The chick I hooked up with last night is my girlfriend older sister. Who is in town visiting. Who I just met. Who I just had dinner With. Who is here along with their parents and the whole family. How did my luck get so bad?
I can't wait for you to tell me about your sex.
It's a short, short story.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
They're either celebrating their tax money or trying to kill each other.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I just saw a guy faceplant off a unicycle while holding a saxophone, while his buddy riding another unicycle and sporting a flute rode by laughing
Only at UConn...
Randomize
