can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
I really don't want to move...I'm having a motivation problem.
kev is about to show us pictures of the tranny he accidentally fucked last night.
I'll be there in 10
I think jizz is working it's way to becoming my number 1 food source.
he used his one phone call on me and it said "you have a collect call from- LETS GET IT- at the montgomery county jail".
i remember introducing him to all my posters and making him be extra nice to frank sinatra and bob dylan before he fucked me
I just got a booty call..Its 6 pm..a brave attempt to climb the rotation ladder..I like his ambition.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
He pulled a potato out of his bag in the library. A WHOLE FRIGGIN POTATO. He ate it like it was an apple and waved at the librarian as she stared at him.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I'm honestly wondering if my vagina did something to offend the universe
The dominoes guy came back thirty mins later to ask me out. I guess he figures if I'm eating pizza alone I must have gotten dumped
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
He has a penis. Therefore, he counts.
Randomize
