My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
watching jon and kate + 8 right now is like watching my parents split up
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
for future reference: even when 4 loko is flat it still fucks you up. im near a tree. come find me.
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
I don't want to die alone with cake watching shows about cake
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
You tried to eat your way through the wall. Like you literally tried to eat drywall and insulation.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Randomize
