the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dreamt I won the Huge Cock Championship last night. It was glorious.
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
she wants homewrecking advice
are you gonna teach her your ways?
obvs. i'm like her yoda.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
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