hey im gonna send you a picture of my dinner
if its a picture of your dick again we are no longer friends
I set the bag of cheetos on the open box on my coffee table while I was watching TV. I was so high I ate half of the styrofoam peanuts in the box by accident. Am I going to die?
I hope so
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
when I picked him up he smelled like cheeseburgers, had a bite mark around his left nipple and we think someone stabbed him in the forehead with a pencil... it was like the Hangover meets Texas Chainsaw Massacre
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're trying to leave but amy's hitting on the guy who mans the nacho cart
I wanna get shitfaced and yell about Tim tebow
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Let's just not urinate on things that don't need to be urinated on
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
We had sex in Lake Michigan for an hour Sunday.
Thanks for ruining an entire lake for me. I hate you so much right now.
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