They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Just tried to chase Captain Morgan with water...this whole drinking alone business is getting harder to do.
then you gave the doctors and nurses bloody high fives
I'm sad your dog died... Her name is my stripper name.
He was banging holes in the kitchen wall with pots. They tried to pull him away but only managed to pants him. He kept "drumming".
They are fixing my bike for free, trying to smoke me out, and their kids keep hugging me.
You were saying you didn't want to go home and insisted that I drop you guys off at your uncles. That's how you ended up sleeping on a porch with two dudes
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
Everything was cool until I tried to photo bomb those Hells Angels, then it's all a blank
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
