i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
i leave for school in 3 days. if you want your annual goodbye blow job you should probably call me
my host sister just stared at me as i knocked over the lamp, then took out all my chocolate, walked into the bathroom, and locked the door. i'm officially the worst exchange student ever.
Cops said there's a crazy dude with a mask in my neighborhood. Don't get stabbed.
If he was naked that was me.
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
I forgot if I was chewing my gum or my tongue
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
Man the amount of drugs being done at a wedding with a bunch of surgeons was disturbing
Randomize
