you wouldn't stop saying "oil can" in the tin man voice until I gave you back your flask
Good, she had spurs on her boots. That is a sign for instant herp attack.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
You rang?
Saw a ginger and the first thing I thought of doing was yelling "you have no soul!" so I called you so we can yell it together with you on speakerphone.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
The inflatable penis from those pics was mine... We broke him that night
I've been eating like all day, let me suffer my one 'Dear lord, I'm the size of a small whale. One that doesn't even need to find being killed by illegal whaling because I'm not even big enough to provide an decent blubber, but still big enough to be considered for a brief moment.' moment in peace.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
We were so amazed while watching mission impossible ghost protocol last night we didn't even have sex
Grumpy Cat is dead and fuck EVERYTHING.
I woke up under a house in Key West
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