small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I don't even know. I woke up to a text from someone named Vick saying he was 'legit worried' that I had herpes.
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
You are like a vicious sex animal persistently seeking prey
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I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Well we're either getting a bunny or I'm getting you pregnant in about 12 days.
Just realized I've gone to court three different times with papers and a joint roller in my briefcase. #lawyeroftheyear
i dont know the whole gay terminator look is really hot on him
pretty sure I woke up to him jacking himself off IN MY BED
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I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize