In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
IF SOMEONE ASKS YOU IF YOU WANT THE GOOD DRUGS YOU SAY YES.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Like theyre better than no shoes. I'm sitting her balls naked playing xbox in nothing but crocs with the fur
the bar didnt serve shots so jim ordered us jaeger neat. it worked.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
He KNOWS ALL THE WORDS TO "JESUS IS MY FRIEND", I swear if he even tries to pull shit with me I'm becoming an actual nun.
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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