There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
He broke up with me by playing Lynyrd Skynyrd "Free Bird".
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
Of course he got arrested. He was wearing a toga. Even Tom Hanks couldn't act sober in a toga.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
It takes a special kind of Adderall to make me go to the hardware store, buy paint, and paint tiny polka-dots on all four of my bedroom walls.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
Can we go to the gas station to get cigarettes before we get drunk. It's hard enough to say Marlboro sober.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
Randomize
