idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
Just saw actual Chinese people doing a Chinese firedrill. Good day.
If I was doing exactly what I wanted right now I would be getting fucked on a jet ski while listening to "When Love Takes Over" by Kelly Rowland while eating french fries.
while fucking on the counter the whip cream was conveniently right next to us. i love thanksgiving
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
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